Skyfall – a Premium Bond?

 I think I left my gun in the gents..

I went to see the new James Bond film ‘Skyfall’ this weekend. It has been very successful at the box office I understand, and Daniel Craig is certainly able to carry off the action hero version of Bond with the appropriate swagger.  He can run across the top of a speeding train (or at least his stunt man can) wrestle a baddie underwater, and wields a firearm as easily as Barack Obama wins an election, but as an actor he is often left desperate for a decent line of script. The best he gets is when Q gives him a mere radio transmitter and gun at gadget camp. ‘It’s hardly Christmas’ he says. ‘What were you expecting – an exploding pen?’ says Q. Yes, yes I would very much have liked an exploding pen or just something a bit more fun . If they were trying to be so ‘dark’  and  modern how come Moneypenny travelled to Macau to give him a message instead of sending him a text? And why were’t ANY of them on twitter or facebook?

I want revenge for this hairdo

Xavier Bardem with his bad dye job and camp demeanour did his best to be bad without the aid of  a fluffy white cat, a henchman with metal teeth or any sharks. He had a grudge against Judy Dench who abandoned him when he was one of her spies, and I have to say so did I. We all love Dame Judy, but she is as convincing a spymaster as Kelly Osbourne is a style icon (although Kelly did win award for this.) I have just watched Judy in another film -The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel. She played an impoverished retiree who has to get a job as a ‘cultural advisor’ in an Indian call centre. A lot more likely on the whole I’d say. There were a lot of close ups of Dame Judy, far more than the over seventies usually get on celluloid and I can only think that this was compensation for the fact that she gets killed off in this film.  ‘She must also die in the arms of Bond!’ I can hear her agent negotiating.

I spy with my little eye..

The bond girl with the obligatory unpronouncable European name didn’t get much to do bar look a bit scared smoke a fag really fast, and have a glass of whiskey shot off her head. Bond turned out to be Scottish and his family home was a sort of Bates Motel arrangement nestling in the wilds of Glencoe, called Skyfall. It was inhabited by a Scottish gamekeeper with an English accent. After driving up the M6 with M in his Aston Martin which remained totally pristine after its 500 mile trip J&M became under seige from the baddies who had amazingly tracked them down within half an hour of their arrival. Dame Judy made some homemade explosives out of broken lightbulbs and shotgun cartridges and James held off their entire arsenal including a machine gun toting helicopter, with his father’s old hunting rifle. I did feel a pang when the Aston Martin was shot to shreds and blown up though….Try Review of Danny Boyle’s Trance

Better than a transit van..

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